“Of the delights of this world man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven.” –Mark Twain

Approaching the great spiral stairway at the end of the road, a shapely figure in a red micro-mini and feathered boa, says to a frumpy figure in a black habit and wimple, “I must be going down, for sex was my way of life, while you must be going up.” Holding its wimple, the frumpy figure hops on the banister and shouts, “…Been there, done that.”

          Any adult who seriously thinks that sex is an antonym for heaven, and chastity a synonym, needs to get laughed.

“Any real ecstasy is a sign you are moving in the right direction, don’t let any prude tell you otherwise.” –Saint Teresa Of Avila

If there were no sex in heaven, heaven on earth would be limited to the innocent childhood of life, as in the Garden story. But there’s a snake on the Garden path, named Knowledge, and there’s a sweetness in the fruit of its temptation, named Love.

“Love is simply the name for the desire and pursuit of the whole.” –Plato

True lovers in the night, like saints in the light, intuit that the process of life, the universe, et al., is patterned on some ineffably beautiful truth.

“The omnipresent process of sex, as it is woven into the whole texture of our man’s or woman’s body, is the pattern of all the process of our life.” –Havelock Ellis

Laying aside scriptural, mythical, and clinical exceptions, all humans are born through contact sex. But intellect may tell us there’s more to our story than sex.

“An intellectual is a person who’s found one thing that’s more interesting than sex.” –Aldous Huxley

And statistics may give sex a naughty name.

“A nymphomaniac is someone who has more sex than you do.” –Alfred Kinsey

So let us name the great spiral stairway, Sex and Beauty, and allow our intuition to disrobe Lady Chatterley‘s secret.

“Sex and beauty are inseparable, like life and consciousness, and the intelligence which goes with sex and beauty, and arises out of sex and beauty, is intuition.” –D. H. Lawrence

Write a seriously funny philosophical joke about intuition, say. Help the horny and the holy to laugh with the gods.

“The only thing wrong with being an atheist is that there’s nobody to talk to during an orgasm.” –Anon.