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“The gods only laugh when people ask them for money.” –Japanese Proverb

Turtle TwistJohn D. Rockefeller slips the bank teller a note that reads: “TRANSFER THE MONEY FROM GOD’S ACCOUNT INTO MINE.” The teller says, “But you already have more money than God!”

Money is a seriously funny joke. People don’t just beg, borrow and steal it, you know. They train for it, bust their humps for it, wed for it. Many live for it. Some die for it. But why?

“God gave me my money.” –John D. Rockefeller

The agrarian metaphor of life, the universe, et al.—the same sod-buster that grew the Grim Reaper, sowed the idea that money is the root of all evil.

“The nature of people demands that most of them be engaged in the most frivolous possible activities – like making money.” –Marshall McLuhan

Homesteaders with callouses on their hands and creditors on their backs, cultivated the idea that idleness is the root of all evil.

“Far from idleness being the root of all evil, it is rather the only true good.” –Soren Kierkegaard

So which is it—money or idleness? Well, according to The Farmer’s Almanac…No, just kidding. According to this idler’s seriously funny philosophy of life, the universe, et al., the root of the issue is work.

“Work is a necessary evil to be avoided.” –Mark Twain

As the first garden metaphor illustrates, we need only one thing to be happy forever: blissful ignorance of the facts of life. We need only leave physical desire to the birds and the bees, and we’re rolling in clover. No worries about where our lettuce and cabbage may come from. Never any need to count a single bean.

“I think the person who takes a job in order to live – that is to say, for the money – has turned himself into a slave.” –Joseph Campbell

What’s so serious about working in order to live? The price.

“The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it.” –Henry David Thoreau

What’s so funny about not working for the money? The pleasure of having nothing else you’d rather do, and all of time to do it now.

“Nothing is really work unless you would rather do something else.” James Matthew Barrie

There is nothing else we’d rather do than read your seriously funny philosophical joke about a gift of the gods.

A guy in a Bill Gates mask slips the bank teller a note that reads: “TRANSFER THE MONEY FROM MY ACCOUNT INTO GOD’S.” The teller winks and says, “Already done, Mr. Buffett.”


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